declawing grandma

Cats – I know they have to “exercise” their claws by shredding things like furniture. That’s why I got our kittens a first-class scratching post and liberally sprinkled it with catnip. They use it, but are still attacking the furniture. I went back to the pet supply place and explained the situation.

The kindly woman at the store invited me to sit on the floor with her while she demonstrated how to clip cat toenails. Her demo cat was one that lived in the store. It was the most passive animal I’ve ever seen. This cat was like a fur bag filled with Jell-O. It could barely maintain its cat shape as she hefted it into her lap and demonstrated the toe clip. The feline had an “oh, whatever” look in its eye that indicated you could have given it a liver transplant without anesthesia and it would have just sat there and purred. Our kittens would turn into a squirming frenzy of talons and teeth if I even thought about trimming their nails.

Then the woman launched into the familiar admonitions about never, ever declawing a cat. There are vets who will do it, she said, but imagine taking your grandmother to the hospital and having the doctors tell you that they’re only going to chop off her fingers down to the first or second knuckle. “That’s what it’s like for a cat. It’s mutilation.” I’d heard all this before, so just to play a little devil’s advocate, I suggested that neutering and spaying a cat was also mutilation.

I should have said, “Imagine taking your six-year-old son into the hospital and having him castrated! That’s what it’s like for cats.” I didn’t say that, but I wanted to puncture some of the self-righteousness involved when recoiling in horror at declawing while routinely recommending spay and neuter. I know there’s a big ethical difference between birth control and claw control, but from the cat’s point of view, both are forced on them and both are a form of mutilation if you want to use the word.

For the record, our cats have been spayed and we don’t have declawing plans. And for the record, we did have my grandmother de-fingered and she got used to it quickly. No more long fingernails accidentally cutting me or punching holes in the sofa.