dwarves and their sins

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I wore my “sloth” choir robes at Hushville’s annual cocktail party. It started a conversation about the seven deadly sins, which veered off onto the seven dwarves. I boldly stated that there was sure to be correlation between each sin and each dwarf. After giving it a little thought, the connections came together like this:

Bashful. The quiet types are seething with jealousy and desire. Bashful is a living time bomb. Bashful is the sin of Envy .
Grumpy. Grumpy has murdered fellow dwarves for not lowering their eyes when he passes. Grumpy is Wrath.
Doc. The only dwarf with a medical degree, this one thinks he’s a god. He’ll let a patient die rather than admit that he’s wrong. He is Pride.
Dopey. He eats so much (chicken wings and waffles, for the most part) that he staggers around glassy-eyed. Dopey is Gluttony.
Happy. So why do you think he’s grinning all the time? This dwarf is sexually active and very busy. He is Lust.
Sneezy. So much coke has gone up his nose, he can’t stop sneezing. And yet he wants more. His sin is Greed.
Sleepy. No more needs to be said about this lazy punk. Sloth.

Your suggestions and corrections are welcome. Maybe Sleepy is Lust. Maybe Doc is Greed. It’s an important issue, so I’m open to debate.

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