who wants to sleep?


50+ hours every week, horizontal, with my eyes closed? Who needs it? Not me. I’ve cut down but I can’t quit. Just when I think I’ve got the habit beat, it creeps up on me again. I wake up and think, “Damn! I did it again.” There’s probably a support group for this–a 12-step program. I wonder if you have to believe in a higher power, like Hypnos? “Hi, I’m Dang and I have a sleep problem.”

Macbeth had a more direct approach.

Methought I heard a voice cry “Sleep no more!
Macbeth does murder sleep,” the innocent sleep,
Sleep that knits up the ravell’d sleave of care,
The death of each day’s life, sore labour’s bath,
Balm of hurt minds, great nature’s second course,
Chief nourisher in life’s feast—

He makes sleep sound almost pleasant, not the time-waster we know it is. He managed to murder sleep by murdering his king and queen and slipping a knife into his own scruples. That doesn’t sound feasible, so I think I’ll try writing in iambic pentameter.

I don’t want to sleep so now I’ll fight it,
Pretend that sleep is a dog bone and bite it,
Or shake it off like a duck shakes water,
I’ll make sleep the lamb and bedtime the slaughter.

– William Blogosphere, from “The Dangnab Tragedy “


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