terror from beneath the sea


Beware. Clam chowder soup may be part of a terrorist plan to destroy America’s kitchens. I put a bowl of the stuff in the microwave today, set a cover over it to prevent splattering, and about two minutes later…blam! The cover is blown off and the interior of the microwave is a hellish scene of dismembered clam, potato chunks, and white globs. What a mess.

Worse yet, it might not be a terrorist microwave-chowder bomb, it could be the work of a vengeful god. If I had read Leviticus first, I might have been saved. It’s too late for me, but save yourselves from unspeakable horror and possible damnation that comes from both shrimp and clams. You have been warned.


4 thoughts on “terror from beneath the sea

  1. dangblog

    Okay. I’m not Jewish or clamish so I guess I can relax (and use a stove top). It’s a relief that I don’t have to follow that Leviticus stuff: death to anyone who curses their parents, death to adulterers, death to wizards, death to blasphemers, and so on. And I don’t have to go neighboring countries to acquire slaves, I can use locals!

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